Mark Angel Comedy – Corona Virus https://dailyparrots.wpcomstaging.com/comedy/mark-angel-comedy-corona-virus/

Pastor, my dog is dead. Could there be a service for the poor creature?”

Pastor replied,we cannot have service for an animal in the church.

But there is a new Church down the road,maybe they will do it.

The man said,”Do you think they will accept a donation of U.S $250,000 for the burial service?”

Pastor exclaimed,”Sweet Jesus!” Why didn’t you tell me the dog was a Christian?”

A wife to her husband:”Honey,what are you doing?” “I’m reading our marriage certificate.” “What for?” “I’m looking for the expiry date…”

Akpos farts(pollutes the air) in the classroom and the teacher gets really upset and throws him out.He goes and sit outside the class. The principal walks by and sees him sitting outside laughing.He asks,”Akpos,what are you doing outside sitting down laughing?” Akpos replies”I farted in class and the teacher threw me out.”The principal asks”Well then, why are you laughing?” Akpos replies,”Because they are in class taking in the smell while I’m here taking in the fresh air.”

One day 3 men were walking through the forest wen dey were caught by canibalz.

d canibals told each man, to bring ten fruits of anykind and swallow,

b4 dey wud b released and not killed.

d first man came with an apple,he swallowd three and startd coughing,he was kild,

d secnd man came with grapes,he swallowed nine, wen he was abt 2 swallow the last 1,he started laughing,he was kild,

so wen d 2 men reached heaven,d first man asked the secnd man,why did u laf when you had almst swalowed all,

d secnd replied, i could not help it,wen I saw the thirt man coming with watermelons. LOL

Akpos:Happy Birthday Sweetie

Girl: Thanks so much baby…So what’s my birthday gift?

Akpos:(pointing)See that BMW parked over there.

Girl:Oh my God!….yes….yes….yes….I can’t believe this…

Akpos:I bought you a toothbrush of the same colour…

Girl:Na THUNDER go fire you!

Two kingdoms,Ashanti and Ewe kingdom, decided to hold a drinking competition to test one supremacy.

A week to the competition, the Ewe kingdom sent a delegate,Efo,to Ashanti to confirm if the competition will still hold.

When Efo got there, people of Ashanti brought 20 litres of their Akpeteshie(local gin) to welcome their guest.

Efo asked:Can I test it?

The people said;go ahead

Efo drank and finished all the 20 litres of wine and said; surprising….this is good for a child’s birthday, where is the main drink?

The people of Ashanti shouted;come ooo are you among the competitors?

Efo replied:Me!!!No,I did not even qualify.

There was a girl Akpos really loved but he never had the guts to tell her how much he loves her. One night, at around 11pm, he summoned some courage and sent her an sms saying, “I love you so much, I wanna date you. Please reply and tell what you feel about me.” A few seconds later he received a message alert on his phone. He was so scared and too tensed to open it that night, so he decided not to check the reply until the next morning when he will be less tensed. When he woke up the next morning, he said his prayers,did his morning chores, brushed his teeth, ate his breakfast, then jumped back to his bed and gently picked up his phone to read the message. So he started reading:”Dear customer you have insufficient balance to complete your request. Kindly recharge your account and try again. Thank you”.

One day an employee came into work with both of his ears bandaged. His boss asked him what happened to his ears?.

“Yesterday I was ironing a shirt, when the phone rang and I accidentally answered the iron instead of the phone!”

“Well”the boss said,”that explains one ear, but what about the other?”

“They called back”

Akpos and his two friends attended a party and got themselves drunk……On there way home they chatted a cab(taxi). When they entered, they told the driver there destination..The driver noticing that they were drunk started his car and turned it off..He turned and told them that they have arrieved at their destination……they paid the taxi driver his money,and he was happy that his plan worked…to his grtest surprise while AKPOS was coming down he gave him a sound slap….the driver thought that Akpos knew what he did but decided to ask Akpos why the slap and Akpos answered“YOU ALMOST KILLED US““